My heart raced as I drove to Kwang Hua High School. One of my ex-students called earlier to tell me that the school guards had turned them away at the school gate. Outsiders were not allowed to witness the Graduation Day Concert; only parents were allowed "What the. . . damn those stupid school rules!", my heart screamed in anger as my hands clenched tightly onto the steering wheel. There was no way I was missing my students' graduation. I'd promised them weeks ago that I would be there and to me, a promise is a promise. I stepped harder on the accelerator.
I found a spot a good distance away from the gate and parked there regardless. I ran as fast as I could, the fear of being turned away at the school gate, fueling my every step. I reached the gate to find my 'brother' waiting for me. After a few moments, the gate opened and the guard let me in. A huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. My 'brother' and I waited at the gate for the approval letter to arrive and it took a while. Then, my 'brother' received a phone call. The performance had begun! We hesitated and then, in plain rationality, I asked the guard if we could go ahead without the letter. . . he said 'OK'. God bless his soul.
So, we ran, up the steep road, round the bend, onto the straight, up the stairs and into a crowd of people watching in the hall. I pulled my camera out as soon as I found a seat and started recording. I was still in time to witness the second half of the performance and I immediately took in the atmosphere of the moment. It was electric!
I spent the next few hours recording my students' performances and cheered them on by shouting out their names. I was a teen again. Then, during the last performance, my students persuaded me to join them in a chain-running frenzy and I duly obliged as we held onto each other's shoulders and swarmed the stage and back down again in one swift flow. I was really a teen once more and I loved it!
At the end of the ceremony, many of my students started crying and I went around hugging and consoling them. I don't know why but in that moment, I felt like crying too but I held back. Seeing them cry because the realization of separation had set in, it made me think of how naive and childish I once was and how I yearn to be that again... to be young again. What a joy it would be if in that moment, I could be transported back to my school days and be surrounded by familiar faces once more. . . faces which have now grown old and weary. Growing up has a way of sucking the life out of us as we chase our dreams. So much innocence is lost in our pursuit of a better life that sometimes, we forget that the better life has already come and gone. A student's life is the better life. . . a student's life is the best life.
I felt the rush of exhilaration racing through my veins and my heart thumped with the beat of youthful energy as my students mischievously grabbed my arms and legs and threw me up into the air with screams of delight. It was the first time I'd experienced it and it took me by surprise how much I enjoyed it. Being mercilessly thrown into the air, it was at once ridiculous and empowering. Even now, at my age, I've managed to experience something only a teen could go through and in that very moment, I knew that I was indeed living a teenage dream.
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